EFT – Emotionally Focused Therapy
The Most Effective Couple Therapy
At the Relationship Centre, we use an approach called Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). This modality was developed to help couples in distress. EFT is recognized as one of the most successful approaches to couple therapy with recovery rates between 70-75% and improvement rates of 90%. (Printable version of “What is emotionally focused couples therapy?”)
Do you want to increase your odds of success?
- Up to 75% of couples move from distress to recovery with EFT
- 90% of couples show significant improvement
- Effective with heterosexual and same sex couples of all ages and stages of relationship
- Useful with partners suffering from anxiety, depression, PTSD or chronic illness
- Improves communication and relationship satisfaction
Your relationship doesn’t have to be this hard.
Together we can make it easier.
EFT therapy is for you if:
- You have the same argument over and over and nothing works to make it better
- You are exhausted from trying so hard
- You know you care about each other but you still feel invisible and unheard
- You want the fighting to stop
- You want more trust, connection and intimacy together
- You want to know that you matter to your partner and that you are important and special
- You want to enjoy your partner and your relationship again
EFT helps address the core questions we often ask ourselves about our most important relationship:
- Do I matter to you? Can I trust you? Will you value me?
- Will you be there for me when I need you?
- Can I feel safe and secure enough in this relationship to be my true self?
EFT Goals are to:
- Expand and re-organize partners’ key responses to one another.
- Create a shift in partners’ interactions to one another.
- Create a secure connection between partners.
How EFT Works
EFT is a powerful modality of therapy developed by Dr. Sue Johnson and Les Greenberg in the 1980’s. It is highly structured and consists of key change strategies that have been mapped into 3 Stages and 9 Steps.
When we can’t find a safe, loving way to stay connected to our partner we go into a state of emotional pain and alarm. We automatically respond by protesting or withdrawing (fight or flight) when we feel this fear or panic. Our partner will then often respond with his or her own protest or withdrawal. This cycle is a “neural duet” between partners – they impact each other both physiologically and emotionally creating a feedback loop of negative interactions.
EFT is a systematic map of steps and stages that understands these cycles as the underpinnings of relationship distress. Couples are helped to create nurturance, love and connection in their relationships. Change strategies and interventions are specified within the EFT steps and stages. Couples learn to identify their cycle, the emotions underlying the reactions and their parts in the dance as they come up in the session and at home. Couples learn to regulate their emotions and send clear emotional signals of their needs to their partner. They also learn how to respond in a healthy way to the signals that are sent to them.
Couples begin to actively create a new, positive cycle where they can express their needs and fears and create accessibility and responsiveness. When we can send clear attachment cues we actually pull our partner closer and create safety, trust and support that we have been yearning for. EFT is collaborative, experiential model that encourages couples to be involved in the deconstructing of the negative cycle and the creation of a new, secure relationship.
Every relationship can use a roadmap to success.
Let us help you navigate the twists and turns
on your way to a healthier relationship.